I Said Such Awful Things

In my heart I was never a racist or a hater of any kind but my mom taught me to dislike certain people because of the way they were.
When I was 12 years old I made an awful racist speech in front of my entire 6th grade class. My teacher by the way was African American.

I said this;
-Black people are lazy and all they do is live off welfare.
-Black people are stupid
-Black people smell like poop

It hurts my heart to remember this and to realize I actually said these words. I didn't know what I was saying. I love black people and all race.
I wish I didn't call the nice little boy who wanted to play with me a niger. Ohhh! how I wish I could see him and apologize. I remember telling him, "You are still a niger".

I am sorry to all the black people out there.I was stupid and naive. My mother taught me these things. Now I am a grown women and I know that those things are wrong. My best friend in 2nd grade was black and liked a boy in thh 5th grade who was also black. I feel for black people. I can imagine all that they go through. This is something in my life I find it hard to believe it happened. I am surprise the black kids at school didn't beat me up. They should have!